By Sue Shellenbarger
There is a whole lot of complaining going on in many workplaces. All the griping has far-reaching effects on both individual and group performance. Work teams whose communication is marked by distrust, negativity and cynicism tend to turn in lower profits and get poor performance ratings from bosses, co-workers and customers, according to studies at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, and the Universade Catolica de Brasilia.
Upbeat teams with members who encourage and express appreciation for each other not only reap more profits and higher customer-satisfaction ratings, but they give each other more chances to be creative and take constructive action, the research shows. That doesn’t mean the top teams are all sweetness and light, but they keep positive-to-negative interactions at a ratio of 3-to-1 or higher, the research shows.
To cope with chronic complainers, it helps to understand their motives, says Will Bowen, an author and speaker on the topic. Some are trying to duck responsibility for screwing up, so they blame somebody else. In these cases, he suggests turning the focus back on the complainer, asking what they plan to do differently the next time.
Others try to make themselves look good by putting colleagues down, Mr. Bowen says. If a colleague calls another co-worker lazy, he says, compliment them on the opposite attribute (if you can do so truthfully), by saying, “One of the things I’ve always appreciated about you is how hard you work,” says Mr. Bowen, author of “A Complaint-Free World.”
A particularly damaging complainer is one who wants to gain power, and who “complains as a way of getting people on their side,” Mr. Bowen says. Attracting colleagues to a gripe fest can expand the power-seeker’s influence, not only over peers but over bosses who are the targets. In such cases, Mr. Bowen suggests urging the complainer to take their beef directly to the person they’re attacking, saying, “It sounds like you two have something to talk about.”
Some bosses simply refuse to tolerate complainers. Trevor Blake, an entrepreneur and author of “Three Simple Steps,” a book about the mental skills needed to succeed, says if any employee in any of the four companies he founded refused to help find solutions for their gripes, “they no longer had a place in my company.” He recommends avoiding co-workers’ gripe fests and, if possible, distancing yourself from complainers by taking a break away from the office, or by consciously focusing on positive images or places.
- (The Wall Street Journal)
